bigpimpinmba's Diaryland Diary

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Walking never felt so cool

You know those moving walkways in the airport?

Kick ass, right?

You’re walking along, but you feel like you’re traveling at like mach 12 and doing a flyby of the tower, making the Commander spill coffee on his chest.

“Damnit Maverick!”

I like that too. It’s a cool feeling.

Well, you’ve never had a feeling like the feeling that you get walking on the moving walkways in Singapore.

“Why is that?”, you may ask.

“What could make Singapore the coolest moving walkway place on the planet?”, others might pontificate…

I’ll tell you impatient bitches.

It’s because, in Singapore, you’re not walking on a moving walkway, your walking on a Travellator.

A Bone-A-FIDE TRAVELLATOR!!!!!

As if you are ever going to feel any cooler than you do when you are walking on a Travellator.

Go try to find a Travellator in Camden, Des Moines, Plano or even Eugene. Wait. Don’t bother cause you ain’t findin no Travellator in any of those places.

Say it out loud…. Travellator.

Sweet Funky Moses, I said to say it OUT LOUD!

TRAVELLATOR!!!!

TRAVELLATORTRAVELLATORTRAVELLATOR!!!!

You can’t tell me that you aren’t the pinnacle of cool saying “Travellator.” It just don’t get better than that.

I’m going home and bragging to all my friends about this. I might not even tell them what it is, but you’re damn skippy that I’m bragging about my Travellator experience.

“Hey Stu, You ever been on a Travellator?”

“Gee Willackers, Pimp, I actually can’t say that I ever have been.”

“Feyg.”

It’s like the ultimate Pimp hand. I think I can almost end my arguments by just saying , “Travellator”. And that would be the end of things. Kind of like Shatner’s character’s trump card on Boston Legal…. Denny Crane. There is no real response to it.

Pimp: “You know Bob, you make some interesting points, but….”

Bob: “But what, Pimp?”

Pimp: “Travellator”

Bob: “Shit. I forgot. I’m sorry.”

I hope you can all see how life-altering this is.

The good people of Singapore took a pretty commonplace item, a walkway, and made it infinitely cooler by calling it the Travellator.

I think we need to “–ator” a few more everyday things to make them cooler.

Grandpa can now start using his Walker-ator. Once he’s got his Walkerator, ain’t nobody f-ing with his bedpan ever again.

I’m no longer going potty on the toilet. It’s the Shiter-ator.

As I’m typing this, I’m now the Bloger-ator/ Diary-ator. (OK, Diaryator just sounds like a bad time in the bathroom). We won't use that again.

Kiss my asserator.

See you later-ator.

I think I went a little too far with this entry. I'd say I went about however many paragraphs there are in this entry too far to be exact.

12:46 p.m. - 2005-03-15

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