bigpimpinmba's Diaryland Diary


Conclusion of July 4 weekend - AKA Longest Entry Ever.

Saturday, July 3.

Next morning, my parents agree to watch Katie while my wife and I go to the beach with my Christopher. Little man is not too thrilled with the ocean with the waves and everything just yet, so we played on the beach. It is an awesome day and we have lots of fun digging giant holes and dumping water all over Daddy in the hole. (That�s me) My boy keeps saying, �Good time.� Friggin awesome.

Go back to the parents. Lunch is eaten. Naps are taken by the little ones and it is off to help my BILTB (Brother In Law To Be) move a but-load of dirt that he had delivered to his house to fill in a huge-ass hole (Huh. Huh. Huge asshole) where a Koy-pond once was. I kicked that hole�s ass. I was doing jumps and ollies and no-handed cherrypickers with my wheelbarrow while the mere humans (my dad and BILTB) were relegated to wheeling and dumping their dirt weakly into the hole. Wusses.

After my manly dirt-hauling, it�s back to the parents for a shower to go back to BILTB�s house for a barbeque with his family. Kick ass. Meet the new family. Horseshoses. Wife beaters. NASCAR Babies.

The family-to-be turned out to be not so white-trashy after all. In fact, they were pretty decent people who I think I will like hanging out with at future barbeque, beer-drinking, family occasions. BILTB�s brother and his wife (sorry Ubergrrl, he�s married) were good people, who I would like to hang out with more often. More ball-busting people are always welcome at my house. Hell, I might even break out the Colt 45 if they ever come and have a beer at my bar. I�m just that nice of a guy.

More beers are had. My sister asks my wife and BILTB�s brother�s wife (Is this getting confusing enough for you yet?) to be in the wedding. BILTB asks his bro to be his best man and then gives me an uncomfortable lap-dance that left nothing to the imagination and required a shower to ask me if I would be in the wedding. This may turn out all-right. There�s even other drunk folks in the neighborhood, lighting off fireworks. Kids are up way too late and we have to go back to my parent�s house to get them to bed. End of another great day.

Sunday, July 4

Not too much to speak of. Up. Breakfast. Church. (yes, for as much of a ball-busting bastard as I can be, I go to church almost weekly)

Then we go over to my boy Paul�s house for a barbeque, where more beers and good times are had. Paul�s parents live on a lagoon and have a boat. This is a 2 � year olds dream place to hang out. Christopher (mini-me) runs around like a madman, yelling at all of the fake owls that are on the pilings to keep the birds away. He thinks they are hysterical.

I let him run around on the boat like he is the captain and pretend to drive the boat. He�s telling me that he is Captain Feathersword (All you non-parents � Don�t ask) He is in heaven. Until we take a real boat ride, engines and all. Without Mommy (she stays on the land with Katie, who is only 5 weeks old and doesn�t quite have her sea legs yet) This doesn�t go over quite as awesome as I had planned, with my little man crying for Mommy the whole time. Of course, when we get back to the shore and he gets back to Mommy, all he can do is talk about going on the boat for a ride. Kids are funny.

After the barbeque, we take the hour ride to go back to our house. We see lots of fireworks on the way home and Christopher thinks it is the coolest thing he has ever seen. He is still telling us about it five days later. We get home and it�s night-night time for kids and parents alike.

Monday, July 5

Down to the in-laws house for another barbeque. Guess what? More beers with my brothers-in-law and more laughs and good times, this time involving an in-the-ground pool and many fun games with and without the kids.

Kathy�s Mom has a surprise. Our 6-year-old niece is visiting from Oklahoma. We haven�t seen her in two years. She is so friggin� cute. (I know you�re probably not supposed to say friggin� when describing how cute a little girl is, but she�s so friggin� cute) She�s my wife�s Goddaughter and is as sweet as they come. We can�t be happier.

I have three nieces in the 6-year-old age range (I have 8 neices on my wife�s side) who think I�m the greatest, because I have no problem acting like a complete idiot with them and doing whatever they want me to do. My older nieces used to think that I was really super cool too, but now just get embarrassed by me (usually rightfully so) when their friends are around. I can�t wait to embarrass the h-e-doublehockeystics out of my kids when they are teenagers.

So� It turns into a �Uncle Chris, can you throw me in the pool really high, but not too high� hour. Needless to say, Uncle Chris� shoulders were more than a little spent from this game, but my super-cute nieces all thought even higher of me afterward, if that was possible.

Time to eat some steak!

Wait 30 minutes.

Back in the pool for a good game of Laser Death Ball, also known as jump into the pool and have someone throw a basketball at you really fast and try to catch it and retain control while typing a run-on sentence. Everyone is involved. My son gets to sit on the side of the pool with Aunt Lisa, looking extremely cute, saying Ready Set Go.

Remarkably, there is very little carnage, with only one severed limb, two beheadings and one impaling. However, as expected, this is when my older nieces all have their chance to get back at Uncle Chris (or, as I�ve been called, Uncler Meaner � Don�t ask) I�ve never had so many people head-hunting me during a game. Good times. It�s always good to have some bonding with the older kids. They rock.

Desert time then time to go home, with the kids a little cranky from being out in the sun all day.

We put Christopher to bed at 9:45. Katie is nursed by my wife and put to bed at 10:00. We are not far behind. The next thing we know, we hear a baby crying. We look at the clock. It is 4:45 AM. Holy Crap! Katie hasn�t slept past 2:00 more than once. Now, she slept until 4:45! Almost a full night of sleep. We can�t believe it. However, since Katie hasn�t nursed in about 7 hours, my wife�s boobs are HUGE!

An almost complete night of sleep and huge boobs to boot. If that isn�t the cherry on top of my awesome weekend, I don�t know what is.

2:20 p.m. - 2004-07-09



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