bigpimpinmba's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Eat your Brussel Sprouts Next week, I�ll be in Brussels, Belgium for an industry trade show for basically the whole week, so you can all celebrate not having to waste your time reading my idiotic rants. I have glorious visions of stepping off the plane and people just throwing Belgian Waffles covered in Belgian Chocolate at me. This better happen or I�m going to be seriously pissed, just as I was pissed when I met nobody named Jed in Texass. �����������. I wonder if they will have any �Sprout Heads� in Brussels, just like they have cheese-heads in Wisconsin or if that is something only idiot Americans do. �����������. I�ll try, but I�m pretty sure that I will have a very hard time not referencing Dr. Evil�s Belgian father low grade narcolepsy and a penchant for buggery while I�m there. It�s a good thing I�m not with my wife or any of my idiot friends, or there would be way too many references to meat helmets (If I can bring one of these back, I�d be a national hero, right?), shorn scrotums and being insolent and being ritualistically beaten in a burlap sack with a reed. I�m just sayin. �����������. I�ll actually be spending a night in Paris before I go to Brussels. I�m looking forward to some fat loogies and French insults along the line of �American Pigdog�. Awesome. ����������.. File this under moments at work that are both prideful and embarrassing� I pick up the phone to hear my wife say�. �OK, tell Daddy what you did�.� �DADDY I DID PEEPEE ON THE POTTY!!!!� What good Dad doesn�t respond by being incredibly proud and yelling�. �YOU DID PEEPEE ON THE POTTY????? I�M SOOOOO PROUD OF YOU. YOU DID A GREAT JOB BUDDY!!!!!� Laughter from everywhere in the office, but I don�t care. My little man may save himself from, as WarCryGirl would say, "pissing his way out of a college education." With the potty training, THEY apparently say that you should basically let your kid run around naked all the time, if they want to, and go to the potty as they please. This means that my son is basically naked as long as he is awake. Eating? Naked. Running? Ummmm.. Naked. Climbing? Nudey. Jumping? Nekkid. Crawling? Full Monty. Crocheting? In the flesh. You name it�. Naked. It is friggin hilarious. But the kid is peeing in his little potty in the corner of the room, so I ain�t complaining. And it cuts back on laundry! As long as we can get some clothes on him before kindergarten, I�m not worried. ����������� I just about pissed when laughing when I saw on a website one of those boxes where you had to type the letters that are scrambled up as a form of verification that you�re a human and not some uber-machine trying to register. Below the little box was the following: Visually impaired? Click HERE. Seriously� On a website. What the hell is the point of this? Whose bright idea is it to have a visually impaired link? Are they going to be able to see where to click? Are they going to be able to read the next non-brail internet page? I have GOT to meet the genius who came up with that idea. ����������� It�s pretty sad when you are so lazy that you get pissed that the little cursor is not already blinking in the Yahoo! ID box when you go to check your Yahoo mail. I mean I�ve actually got to move the cursor over there and click? That�s a little much, don�t you think? �����������. Since I�m going to be away next week with very limited, if any, internet access, I�m going to ask that all the people on my buddy list write their crappiest stuff so I don�t miss out on commenting on your funny shiznit. Take care�.. EuropeanPimpin. 5:22 p.m. - 2004-12-03 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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